TSN Turning Point

Environment - Due to a significant event (layoff) these two survivors’ lives have changed dramatically forever.

Recap: they used to joke about pumping their own heads full of lead but now, they think of pumping their competitors full of lead instead. New movie “Saw VI” instantly popped up in their mind. I must cherish my job/life

These two men, after work, head to Shoppers Drug Mart and purchase rubber surgical gloves.
New Term: MOFB – Morbidly Obese Fat Bastard

Scene 1: Two MOFB come into work (normal work day). They start seeing their co-workers getting calls to attend a mysterious mandatory meeting. Both of them felt left out, so they complain to each other.

Scene 2: Co-workers that attended the meeting never came back, so both of them begin mumbling about what happened? Big A said to Big G “ You didn’t know yet? Big G scratches his belly and says “No, what?” Big A “Our friends are being terminated!”

Scene 3: Big G instantly looks shocked. Big A also can't believe what has happened. As they check the employee user accounts in Active Directory, list of terminations increase dramatically.

Scene 4: Both are in disbelief, both act like trauma patients in ER. Big A starts shredding his underwear in front of the African American lady. Big G starts spitting on Obese Bald guy’s head. Everything just turns to chaos.

Scene 5: Within a split second, these two used to joke about popping their brains across a canvas has changed. They have started to “cherish” their jobs. They no longer want to target themselves as a joke anymore. They start to think about going after their prey (co-workers).

Note: They know that HR is getting hit with terminations today, so they know they only have a narrow window of time to do whatever they want without getting in trouble with HR.

Scene 6: While co-workers are diligently working on phone calls, these two start by sneaking up behind them and “scream”. They just want to see how their co-workers will react. They want to calculate the time between the scream to the time registered by the brain. (experimenting – treating co-worker as test subject)

Scene 7: Big A goes behind them to scream while Big G takes out a stopwatch. Email lady helps record the time elapsed.

Scene 8: Big A says, "I couldn’t scream any more my throat hurts! What else can make a big bang noise??” Big A pulls out a Remington A850 – with a big label on the bottom “Made in China” Big G was surprised but says “Interesting, feasible, just do it...”

Scene 9: While Big A gets it ready. Big G goes over to Obese Bald Guy and says “Do you want to participate in an experiment?” Bald Guy says “sure”. (Of course he has no idea what they are going to do to him.)

Scene 10: Before the experiment begins, Big G takes out some sort of script from his back pocket and reads it out to O Bald guy
1) Any last words? – Bald guy replies “why?” Big G said “Don’t worry about it, nothing just a standard question”
2) This experiment might inflict some level of pain but it should be ok – Bald guy replies “What kind of pain?” Big G said “Not something you would experience in a daily basis but you should be fine.”
3) Do you agreed to participate in this experiment? – Bald guy replies “of course, sounds exciting” – BG signs the agreement but Obese Bald guy forgets to read the fine print
a. This experiment will include making a large hole to your forehead
b. This experiment will include u not be able to see your family again

Scene 11: After agreement signed, Big A proceeds to put a canvas in front of the monitor, straps balloon all over Obese Bald guy’s face and carefully places the A850 behind his head. Then the lever is pulled.

Scene 12: A beautiful painting is made in front of our eyes. Big A has surgical gloves on and asks D (another coworker who is not too intelligent) to do him a favour. “Can you hold the A850 for me?” D says “ok” Police come in and see D holding the A850, they instantly tase him and bring him down like a rabid bear.

The End

Lesson Learned: Tumultuous times not only change your surrounding but it can also change people’s lives. So - do you cherish your life yet?